Describe your neighbor’s mailbox please. May be relevant for next steps.
Advice needed for neighbor issue
- Thread starter republion
- Start date
It is not judgemental to say that you won but insist on retribution. This is vindictive and why I said that most people are uncomfortable with vindictive people. Your refusal to accept a win and walk away is telling.
You confuse “vindictive and retribution” with wanting to know where you stand with a certain individual who presents himself as friendly and neighborly.
"What other people think about you is none of your business." Anon. Why do you care so much about being liked? I do see that same spirit in arguments here that drag on for dozens of replies. Accepting victory is an absolute battle necessity. Declaring victory and then leaving an argument is the best strategy.
We bought/built our house in '99 in what was then an upper-middle class neighborhood. It has now devolved to what I would consider solid middle class. Decent, but not what it was 24 years ago. I will not get into why it is this way. Anyway, it's paid off and my daughter has one year of HS left. After that, we are out.
I've got a neighbor (also a PSU Alum) with two kids. No exaggeration, they have (had) a nice 4 BR home in a nice neighborhood that is literally falling apart. Keep in mind that all of the other houses are maintained and nice.
The kids are now in their mid 20's, jobs delivering pizza, smoking weed in the back yard. I think they have friends living there now too. They have not taken care of the property since day one. They rarely mow the lawn, keep junk piled in their yard, several cars that do not run and are presumed to be junk in their driveway. They still have baby toys in their back yard from their now 20+ year olds. When they get around to shoveling the sidewalk, they just push the snow into the road or pile up at the end of the sidewalk.
Both parents are in poor health and they obviously cannot maintain the home. I have spoken with them and offered help but have recently resorted to calling township. Bottom line, I could call the township every week and nothing will change. They don't care.
I've got a neighbor (also a PSU Alum) with two kids. No exaggeration, they have (had) a nice 4 BR home in a nice neighborhood that is literally falling apart. Keep in mind that all of the other houses are maintained and nice.
The kids are now in their mid 20's, jobs delivering pizza, smoking weed in the back yard. I think they have friends living there now too. They have not taken care of the property since day one. They rarely mow the lawn, keep junk piled in their yard, several cars that do not run and are presumed to be junk in their driveway. They still have baby toys in their back yard from their now 20+ year olds. When they get around to shoveling the sidewalk, they just push the snow into the road or pile up at the end of the sidewalk.
Both parents are in poor health and they obviously cannot maintain the home. I have spoken with them and offered help but have recently resorted to calling township. Bottom line, I could call the township every week and nothing will change. They don't care.
no zoning ordinances you can call the police on? In my 'hood, you cannot have vehicles or appliances in the yard. Grass cannot get above 4".
My neighbor, who fancies himself as a naturalist and artist, painted a giant eye on his garage door. It was actually quite good and people stopped and took photos. Finally, the city threatened to take his home (after he didn't pay fines).
He's actually a good person but the city is always at war with him. He finally got his property named as a wildlife sanctuary which allows him to grow his lawn out. It doesn't look bad but is just different.
Sounds like the guy is pretty different as well. How does one even go about getting their property named a wildlife sanctuary?
If you live in an HOA they have their rules re: look/materials/ consistency etc. Municipalities have their rules too which supercede most HOA's. In my Township we have a manager who handles zoning/permitting and then an inspector who visits the job sites. ANYTHING that adds square footage that is connected to a home- even including a deck- MUST be approved with the permit hanging in the front window. It sounds like the "addition" you mention would definitely require approvals- at least where I live. There are, of course, fees to pay too!
If permits or uses are denied by the Manager there is a 5 member Zoning Hearing Board which I recently was appointed to. We listen to petitions by private residents and businesses for exceptions/variances to established codes. The word "Reasonable" is used a lot. Our job is to formally review the established rules and then provide a decision depending on the plea. We have 2 lawyers and 3 "normal" citizens on our Board, along with a Counsel who is separate from the Township and Planning Commission (which writes our Zoning Codes).
Right now we are in "pool season" where folks are looking for larger footprints and/or setback relief based on topography or wetlands. Our personal feelings about the circumstances matter- but we do not have the ability to circumvent code- nor can we suggest to plaintiffs to seek code revisions. Our last case seemed to be a completely "reasonable" request, and most of us understood and supported the concept (even if the business owner was being a little stealth with likely true intentions). Bottom line is that the terms of the request simply did not exist. We could not rule favorably on it. If they go through the process to add a short term rental designation it is likely that their request would be OK'd....but it wasn't our call to write new terms/code.
So far every hearing has had a lawyer present their case. If people are unhappy with our decision then they take our Township to court. This doesn't help you rat out the neighbor- but does provide some insight into what the process may be if they end up in "the process." It can be expensive. It can be acrimonious. IF you choose to push this I do not see a way to do so without using your name in a public domain.
My wife was an alternate for the Planning Commission and a member who was trying to convert a family farm into townhouses was on the Board. He "recused" himself from all discussions of the matter, but was seated not too far (Within listening distance). In the end he got his approval- turned a field into 75 units that sell for ~$400k each. And then quit the position. So not always an ethical world- such is municipal government.
Good luck.
I used to live in a neighborhood that had bylaws that forbid you from having anything but trees, trees and bushes in your front lawn. The police would knock on your door if your kid left his bike or wiffleball bat out. They would also tell you if your garage door was open at night. It was a bit of a pain but the 'hood always looked awesome and property values increased.
The cars are actually in the driveway (which is still against the ordinance if they are not in working order). I could justifiably call every week if I wanted. I give up.
the police should take care of that. In my area, they give you a warning and then start to fine you. It adds up pretty quickly. If they person becomes a repeat offender, you typically no longer have to call them. The guy ends up being on their "watch list" and part of their daily routine. hey, its a revenue opportunity.
In my 'hood, they just deployed license plate reading cameras. It reads your plate, checks the records, and if you have an outstanding ticket, a car is deployed. it is big brother scary but ends up being better for you in that it weeds out troublemakers pretty quickly.
it is also common to have police cars drive around parking lots with these license plate scanners. To serve and protect!
I appreciate the behind the scenes but my post was in jest. I was posting as if I were Republion's nosey neighbor. Probably not my best work.
I don't think the police get involved until it escalates to a much higher level in my township.the police should take care of that. In my area, they give you a warning and then start to fine you. It adds up pretty quickly. If they person becomes a repeat offender, you typically no longer have to call them. The guy ends up being on their "watch list" and part of their daily routine. hey, its a revenue opportunity.
In my 'hood, they just deployed license plate reading cameras. It reads your plate, checks the records, and if you have an outstanding ticket, a car is deployed. it is big brother scary but ends up being better for you in that it weeds out troublemakers pretty quickly.
it is also common to have police cars drive around parking lots with these license plate scanners. To serve and protect!
I'll call when it gets unbearable. Otherwise, I do my best to not escalate. Otherwise, I am hoping they come to the conclusion that they are not able to take care of the place and sell to a flipper.
Yet again, you seem to be confused. I said nothing about wanting to be liked. I said I want to know where our relationship stands. I’m very nice and forthcoming to him. I have shared personal info with him. It has nothing to do with being liked. It has to do with knowing if the person you are dealing with as a neighbor is two-faced and dishonest. Why are you so confused about this?
You bring up an interesting point.
People's viewpoints on what can be accepted as neighborly is all over the place. I built a home and, as part of that, cemented a new driveway. The neighbor put up a row of arborvitaes so he didn't need to see the construction before the driveway was put in but after the plans were accepted. He claimed the rainwater runoff from my driveway killed his arborvitaes.
Instead of talking to me about it, he knocks on my door to let me know he is going to be filing a lawsuit naming me and my builder. After a short conversation, he then says he is leaving the country for ten days and asks if I will keep an eye on his property! It struck me that he is so used to and easily living in the world of litigation he simply assumed everyone else was as well.
We arranged a conference call the next week with his attorney, my builder and me where we agreed to put in a french drain and he'd replace the plants with no cost to us. Easy peasy but it was uncomfortable when he told me that he was filing a lawsuit.
I've got neighbors who just seem to feel it is OK to come into my yard and stop by. One used to walk over and sit down when we were enjoying dinner. Others have been very private and didn't want anything to do with anyone in the 'hood. I guess the point is to not take things personally. Everyone's culture is different.
It could be worse. I had an aunt and uncle who had a Nepalese family (which is several generations in the same household) move in beside them. They were quite surprised when goat meat was hanging on their shared fence one day. They have since moved. Certainly, everyone's culture is different as you stated.
Agree with most others about not doing anything. Without knowing what the project was it is hard to say if your neighbor had a reason to be upset. Was the project noisy. It was a Saturday, when did you start the project, and did it disturb their sleep? Could have been a number of things that caused the neighbor to get upset and call in a complaint.
I kind of picked up on that, but wasn’t sure. Nice thought, but ya needed more effort on the delivery lol. 😂
my community is pretty good. Something like "you can't hang meat in your yard" in the standard bylaws. So you can take 'one off" issues to a board and they will rule accordingly.
Wouldn't it be great if everyone could be as adult and use logic and common sense as well in political discussions
I suspect that posters of the Jewish, Muslim, Hindu and many other worldwide religions are also capable of offering some wise advice.
Man that’s some crazy talk right there!🥴Wouldn't it be great if everyone could be as adult and use logic and common sense as well in political discussions
You say you are friendly with the suspect. I would casually talk to him someday soon and bring up that someone called code enforcement on you. Say you suspect the person down the street and as soon as you are sure who did it you know how to make them pay a considerable price. Laugh it off like some kinda madman, just waiting for the day. Last words….its gonna be awesome…… Then walk away giggling to yourself…..
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This reminds me of another act by my ahole neighbor. A neighbor on the other side of him from me had grandkids visiting and they were playing in their pool. He told them to shut up and be quiet as it was bothering him.Could handle it passive aggressively...
At a neighborhood event this guy threatened to throw his small dogs to the alligators because they had the nerve to bark on occasion.
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