Happy Father's Day Weekend to the Fathers, Father Figures and Son's of Fathers out there

[Obliviax]

Men take a lot of crap. And sometimes, deservedly so. But a man who is a good father figure is uber important to the family. And this just isn't the kids but to the man's parents as well. I'd also like to point out that I used the word "good" and not great or perfect. Fatherhood comes without a book or a path. Every child is different. Everyone needs different things. So that makes a father good? Effort, consistency, morals, truth, strength, weakness, conviction, curiosity, dedication, and just ****ing being there when you should be. Thanks Dad. And thanks to all the Dads.

That's the post.

 

[Obliviax]

One of the great lessons I learned was taught to me by a priest as he addressed my daughter's first communion.

He as the 30 or so kids to get up and play "follow the leader". the kids lined up behind the priest and he kind of danced around the church while doing things like touching the holy water, standing on a chair, talking into the microphone and so on. The kids dutifully followed along. He had the kids sit back down.

He then asked the kid behind him, how he did follow the leader. The kid said, "easy, I just did what you did." And then the Priest asked the last kid "Jenny, I was way up in front of you. Could you see everything I did?" Jenny said no. So the Priest asked, "So how did you follow the leader?" Jenny said "I just did what the kid in front of me did. I hoped that he was just following the kid in front of him and that that kid was following you." And the Priest then asked "So isn't it true, that even though you may not be the first person in line, that someone is always following your lead? Someone is always watching. And to that person watching, you are a leader."

Chills.

 

[harbest]

Men take a lot of crap. And sometimes, deservedly so. But a man who is a good father figure is uber important to the family. And this just isn't the kids but to the man's parents as well. I'd also like to point out that I used the word "good" and not great or perfect. Fatherhood comes without a book or a path. Every child is different. Everyone needs different things. So that makes a father good? Effort, consistency, morals, truth, strength, weakness, conviction, curiosity, dedication, and just ****ing being there when you should be. Thanks Dad. And thanks to all the Dads.

That's the post.

 

[87 Penn St8]

Today is one of those days that used to be great- and then it was awful- but now is making a comeback.

Raised by a former Marine Captain who lost his dad when he was not yet in high school- my dad fit into Obli's non- perfect category. A 6'5" 235 lb tight end who went to college on a football/basketball scholarship my old man raised us as if we were in his platoon. Discipline, striving for excellence, preparation, awareness of keeping options open and changing tact are a way of life for his children.

One year we took him to an Orioles game for Father's Day and George Will sat near us. My old man went up pregame and asked for a photo. That is the only time he ever snapped a pic with anyone famous that I can remember. Joepa used to walk by our tailgate after games in 1986- and while he took one of me- dad never asked for himself. Same with Lou Holtz and many others. Today I'll think of that day in Camden Yards. He served us well and I miss him.

As for me- fatherhood is the best drug ever. My wife and I chose each other in part to be parents together. We are 100% alined on strategy but weren't in line on tactics. That's part of the challenge- but as long as there is love you will find your way through. Kids sense it.

My son is at his 5 year college reunion this weekend. He called us yesterday to express his gratitude- sort of overwhelmed that he was able to attend the school he did. He credited us with guiding him. There may have been a tear or two shed on both ends of the phone.

My daughter would be 24 right now- but we lost her 6 years ago to a bizarre medical condition that's like Lemmiere's Syndrome. It happened quickly- within 24 hours. Then life became a living hell.

Friends who know the path of child loss told us that things get less awful after 5-7 years. They are correct in our case. The rollercoaster of parenthood is a wild ride- and for all of the pain I still bear, I wouldn't give up those 18 years.

Today will be spent watching my dopey favorite movies: Animal House, Friday and Caddyshack to start.

Then a crabcake lunch- broiled at home- followed by picking crabs and drinking Miller Lites in our picnic area under some great shade trees while listening to the Phillies game. Musical choices will be my daughter's playlist off of her I Pod.

Life will indeed be good. Cheers to all Fathers. 🍻