Prayers from the West Coast for you and your Dad, Paradox. Please keep us posted, dude.
Prayers for my dad
- Thread starter paradox1984
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I'm glad you reached out to those on this board. You, your dad and your family are in my prayers.
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All -
I was awoken at 5:30 this morning by a phone call from the hospital. The breathing tube either became dislodged or clogged and my Dad did not get the oxygen that he badly needs. In turn he went into cardiac arrest and again needed CPR and the AED to resuscitate him. He was brought back again and is "stable, but still very critically ill" as the doctor put it. Sadly, they do not know how bad his oxygen situation got and whether he has sustained any brain damage. They are trying to cool his body to hypothermic temperatures (92 degrees farenheit) because that is supposed to help limit the amount of damage that can be caused. Unfortunately, he is a big guy and the cooling is not nearly as effective as they would like for now.
I was expecting ups and downs, but this one was very down. When I arrived this morning he could not keep his O2 up on the ventilator. They had to use the manual "bag" to make him breathe. Whenever they tried the ventilator, his O2 dropped. There was some brief discussion about keeping him alive long enough for my brother to come in to say goodbye (he was not in town). Thankfully, with some re-positioning, some vaso-dilators, and highest settings on the ventilator, he did get stabilized as I mentioned above. At this point they are probably just going to keep him on 100% oxygen for 2 or 3 days and then try bringing him out of the coma to see if his brain is still functioning well. Unfortunately, they can't test for that when he is induced and paralyzed as he is now.
Again - thank you for your prayers. We are still hopeful that this is a large bump in the road to recovery, but are also realistic about the condition that he is in.
Don't take anything for granted.
I was awoken at 5:30 this morning by a phone call from the hospital. The breathing tube either became dislodged or clogged and my Dad did not get the oxygen that he badly needs. In turn he went into cardiac arrest and again needed CPR and the AED to resuscitate him. He was brought back again and is "stable, but still very critically ill" as the doctor put it. Sadly, they do not know how bad his oxygen situation got and whether he has sustained any brain damage. They are trying to cool his body to hypothermic temperatures (92 degrees farenheit) because that is supposed to help limit the amount of damage that can be caused. Unfortunately, he is a big guy and the cooling is not nearly as effective as they would like for now.
I was expecting ups and downs, but this one was very down. When I arrived this morning he could not keep his O2 up on the ventilator. They had to use the manual "bag" to make him breathe. Whenever they tried the ventilator, his O2 dropped. There was some brief discussion about keeping him alive long enough for my brother to come in to say goodbye (he was not in town). Thankfully, with some re-positioning, some vaso-dilators, and highest settings on the ventilator, he did get stabilized as I mentioned above. At this point they are probably just going to keep him on 100% oxygen for 2 or 3 days and then try bringing him out of the coma to see if his brain is still functioning well. Unfortunately, they can't test for that when he is induced and paralyzed as he is now.
Again - thank you for your prayers. We are still hopeful that this is a large bump in the road to recovery, but are also realistic about the condition that he is in.
Don't take anything for granted.
Hang in there paradox. We will storm the heavens again today for your dad and family.
It is difficult to know what to say in such a dire situation. Certainly I will continue to pray both for your Dad and for your family and I know others will as well. Situations like these often force us to face our own mortality. Perhaps some of us, regardless of your Dad's outcome, will use it as a reason to reflect on our own lives and our relationships with our own family members. Take care.
Best advice ever... follow it. and my thoughts and prayers are with you.
Paradox,
Prayers go out to you. I lost my father one month ago after a 18 day stay in ICU for Sepsis. He was improving, but one night his heart just stopped.
It's awful and tough to see your love ones sick.
Prayers go out to you. I lost my father one month ago after a 18 day stay in ICU for Sepsis. He was improving, but one night his heart just stopped.
It's awful and tough to see your love ones sick.
Very difficult situation for such a young man in facing such a dire situation. May your father and all family members find perfect peace concerning your dad's situation. There are times to fight and stay and times to relax and allow the body to peacefully slide into eternal rest. Whichever is your dad's fate may you and your family share the peace he will know. I lost my dad at age 60, too young for that but we never know our day and time until they arrive. Peace be to you.
Thank you and everyone else. I have very little to update. Today was a very low key day given what transpired Saturday. The didn't want to try anything that could be risky. They did do the hypothermia thing to limit the extent of brain damage, if there is any. They are now bringing him back up slowly. It will take 24 hours to do it. They can control the body temp very easily due to the paralytic drugs which prevent things like shivering that the body would do to warm up on its own.
On the negative side, his chest X-ray was a little worse today than yesterday. However, he needs less O2 from the ventilator than he has for a while, so I'm not sure how the 2 are correlating. We should be able to find out by tues if there is any brain damage. If anyone is looking for specifics to pray for, that would be one to add along with the lung healing.
Thanks again for everyone's support. May God bless all of you.
Nate, I'm sorry for the loss of your dad. I know how much that thought has hurt me this week. I can't imagine it becoming reality.
I've heard too many stories of things like you mentioned. I won't be comfortable until weeks after he recovers and is home.
Prayers sent for your father. I hope he recovers soon to create many memories with you and your entire family.
God Bless.
God Bless.
Hoping things turned upward and your Dad is doing better.
Paradox: Like many posters here, I'm wondering how your dad is faring. Really hoping to see a post from you reporting good news.
I'm sorry for not updating. The past couple of days have been a whirlwind. Yesterday was a pretty good day. His chest X-ray was a little worse, but they took off the paralytic infusion. He was still heavily sedated, but could open his eyes, squeeze our hands, etc, before falling back to sleep. The doctors were encouraged at his brain function. We left last night cautiously optimistic.
Today, I intended to just visit in the morning, go to work, and come back in the evening. When I went in the morning, the doctors were doing there rounds. I waited so I could talk with them. They said that his kidneys were failing and they needed to start dialysis. When talking about prognosis, they said at absolute best, his survival is 50/50. They also said that he is worse than yesterday. I decided to stay bedside again. At about 6pm he started to crash. Thankfully he responded to a quick epinephrine shot and manual bagging for his air. Narrowly avoided a third cardiac event, all of which were caused by his lung failure.
He is getting dialysis 24/7 now, slowly. They say that he put on about 8 liters while in the hospital. His hands, arms, and neck look like balloons. This is so hard. I never saw this coming so young. I love him so much and am increasingly becoming aware that I may never see him again, every time I leave the hospital.
Thank you all again for your prayers.
Edit: forgot to add that they had to paralyze again this morning. He was moving too much and using too much oxygen in the process.
paradox,
we all are pulling for your father, and praying for his improved health. while updates are appreciated, we do realize that your schedule is somewhat unpredictable. you don't need to apologize for not updating as frequently as some of us would like. we'll be more than happy with whatever updates you can provide, whenever you get a chance.
it does sound like your father is in a pretty precarious situation. here's hoping for him, for you, and for the rest of your family that his body is up to the many challenges it is facing.
your father, you, and your family are in my prayers today, and for the foreseeable future.
we all are pulling for your father, and praying for his improved health. while updates are appreciated, we do realize that your schedule is somewhat unpredictable. you don't need to apologize for not updating as frequently as some of us would like. we'll be more than happy with whatever updates you can provide, whenever you get a chance.
it does sound like your father is in a pretty precarious situation. here's hoping for him, for you, and for the rest of your family that his body is up to the many challenges it is facing.
your father, you, and your family are in my prayers today, and for the foreseeable future.
The last thing you should be worrying about is updating us. Yes, we're concerned, but your Dad deserves all your attention. All we can do here is offer our continued prayers and support and we will.
Hang in there paradox. I know it was hard to see this coming as your dad isn't very old but ironically it's his young age that's likely allowing him to keep fighting this disease. We are still praying for him and your family. There will be ups and downs for a while. Keep the faith. We are always here if you just need to vent.
bringing back memories I try locking deep down. I know your pain, and I pray for you and your family and your Father. You;re doing all you can.. and the best you can do is be there. He knows you are by his side and i promise you it means a LOT. stay strong.
We're still with you, paradox, and praying for a turnaround. You're doing a great job supporting your father.
Dad passed away this afternoon at around 2pm after an 11 day fight. Given his condition, we took him off of the meds that were artificially supporting his blood pressure. The doctors said that he would probably not last 24 hours even with the meds. We wanted family to be surrounding him and not to go in the middle of the night. It was the hardest thing that I have ever experienced. I logically know that it is not true, but I feel as though I killed him by telling the doctor to shut it off.
Again - thank you all for your prayers and support.
Again - thank you all for your prayers and support.
These lines are some of my favorite, from Wordsworth's Intimations of Immortality. They have given me great comfort over the years and I hope that all of us on this board, in our own little ways, can support you in your hour of grief.
"What though the radiance which was once so bright
Be now for ever taken from my sight,
Though nothing can bring back the hour
Of splendor in the grass, of glory in the flower;
We shall grieve not, rather find
Strength in which remains behind;
In the primal sympathy
Which having been must ever be;
In the soothing thoughts that spring
Out of human suffering;
In the faith that looks through death,
In years which bring the philosophic mind."
"What though the radiance which was once so bright
Be now for ever taken from my sight,
Though nothing can bring back the hour
Of splendor in the grass, of glory in the flower;
We shall grieve not, rather find
Strength in which remains behind;
In the primal sympathy
Which having been must ever be;
In the soothing thoughts that spring
Out of human suffering;
In the faith that looks through death,
In years which bring the philosophic mind."
You have my deepest sympathies, paradox.
One never gets over the passing of a parent, especially when they depart at a relatively young age. The next week/month/year will be a blur. There is no magic cure; nothing you can take to erase the pain, frustration, and sadness. The best advice I can offer is take it one day at a time. In time, his absence will become the norm, but it will always haunt you.
If you have kids, use this as a lesson to yourself to treasure each day you have with them, and not to get hung up on the small, petty issues that all kids go through while growing up.
Besides life, the greatest gift your father gave you was a whole series of lessons on how to live. They will stay with you over time, though you may tweak a few of them. In time you'll find yourself smiling to yourself, and silently thanking him for many of those lessons, as you go about living your life.
Lastly, don't beat yourself up over the decision your family and you faced. Had he passed away suddenly, you'd be mad that you had no advance warning, or chance to say goodbye. Had he struggled for years, you'd be mad at what he had to endure. I could go on with scenarios, but the point is that no matter how he passed away, you would not be happy, as what you'd want more than anything is for him still to be with you. From the limited info you've given us, it sounds as though your family and you made the right call. Instead of beating yourself up, offer thanks to your father for providing you with the knowledge and strength to make such a difficult decision.
This isn't the outcome that any of us were hoping for, but your father, your family, and you will remain in my prayers, and I expect the prayers of many on this board. Don't hesitate to ask if you need any assistance, or don't hesitate to vent on the board if you feel the need.
One never gets over the passing of a parent, especially when they depart at a relatively young age. The next week/month/year will be a blur. There is no magic cure; nothing you can take to erase the pain, frustration, and sadness. The best advice I can offer is take it one day at a time. In time, his absence will become the norm, but it will always haunt you.
If you have kids, use this as a lesson to yourself to treasure each day you have with them, and not to get hung up on the small, petty issues that all kids go through while growing up.
Besides life, the greatest gift your father gave you was a whole series of lessons on how to live. They will stay with you over time, though you may tweak a few of them. In time you'll find yourself smiling to yourself, and silently thanking him for many of those lessons, as you go about living your life.
Lastly, don't beat yourself up over the decision your family and you faced. Had he passed away suddenly, you'd be mad that you had no advance warning, or chance to say goodbye. Had he struggled for years, you'd be mad at what he had to endure. I could go on with scenarios, but the point is that no matter how he passed away, you would not be happy, as what you'd want more than anything is for him still to be with you. From the limited info you've given us, it sounds as though your family and you made the right call. Instead of beating yourself up, offer thanks to your father for providing you with the knowledge and strength to make such a difficult decision.
This isn't the outcome that any of us were hoping for, but your father, your family, and you will remain in my prayers, and I expect the prayers of many on this board. Don't hesitate to ask if you need any assistance, or don't hesitate to vent on the board if you feel the need.
My sincerest condolences, Paradox ... you are beating yourself up over making what may be the hardest decision that you ever will have to make. Please don't. There are things that we can control in life and we do that. There are other things that we cannot control in life and we deal with and accept them. From what I've read on this thread, you've done better than most of us could ever imagine.
May Larry rest in peace.
May Larry rest in peace.
So sorry to hear that paradox. We will all pray for your dad and family tonight. I know those decisions are beyond difficult but it sounds like you did the right thing.
Oh Man, Paradox. So sorry to hear the news about your Dad. You are a good son to him and you gave him much joy and happiness throughout his life. Always remember that, my friend.
