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OT: Things your dad always said

The Spin Meister

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Readers Digest has people send in things their dad always said. Favorite was one about raising children; "Between the hell of their living and the fear of their dying, there's never a dull moment"

Figure you guys will have some great quotes.
 
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Here are a few.

When I was down about a girl dumping me... "son, men will kill for pussy."

When I got my first job.... "earn a little, spend a little, save a little."

When I complained that someone was rich or had something I didn't.... "son, that's stinkin' thinkin'."

After dinner.... "do your homework, get a degree. No one can take it away from you."
 
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To my bro and me: "You guys are so dumb you'd starve to death watching a poker game with a loaf of bread under your arm."

About my bro and me: "One boy's as good as a man, two boys ain't worth a damn."
 
Here is another one from the old man: "people makes the same mistakes over and over and over again."
 
Into one's life some rain must fall.....
 
"Don't volunteer for anything "(before i went to basic training).
When you get a job -" look busy, keep moving".
Sports -" Look those guys are laughing and shaking hands,you're all upset
because your team lost"
 
One I heard often directed at me was, "Don't be a wiseass. Nobody likes a wiseass."

One of my favorites directed at me, or anybody else with a fat ass was, "Looks like you (he/she) have (has) a couple of pigs in your (his/her) back pockets."

My father was not the type to talk about women much at all, but I can still remember driving down by the beach in Belmar, NJ and a tall, good looking woman in a swimsuit passed heading to the boardwalk. I assume he read my teenage face gawking and said, "Her legs just keep going up until they make an ass out of themselves."

Apparently everything memorable my father said involved an ass.
 
Well, no specific phrase comes to mind. But he very seldom missed any of my baseball or basketball games and ALWAYS told me I played well.....even on those numerous occasions when I played poorly or was the reason we lost.

Actually the most repeated phrase from my Dad was "I love you" and for that I have been and always will be exceptionally blessed. When he died 19 months ago I wrote about him here.....I wish I could retrieve that and post that today. My brother and I were very very lucky to have had him in our lives as long as we did. Sorry guys, got carried away here.....
 
Well, no specific phrase comes to mind. But he very seldom missed any of my baseball or basketball games and ALWAYS told me I played well.....even on those numerous occasions when I played poorly or was the reason we lost.

Actually the most repeated phrase from my Dad was "I love you" and for that I have been and always will be exceptionally blessed. When he died 19 months ago I wrote about him here.....I wish I could retrieve that and post that today. My brother and I were very very lucky to have had him in our lives as long as we did. Sorry guys, got carried away here.....
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Its cool. I remember your post, very moving and heartfelt.
 
No doubt many of you have read Justin Halpern's "Shit my Dad Says." One of the funniest books I have ever read, and it reminds me of shit my own father said. Decidedly non-P.C., but that was OK with me. He meant well.
 
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My Dad had many pieces of advice. My favorite:

  1. When packing for a trip take half the clothes and twice the money.
  2. When you receive an expensive watch/necklace/ring from your wife or girlfriend... immediately go out and buy an exact duplicate and stash it for the day you lose it.
  3. There's no such thing as a stupid question... just stupid people that ask questions (he was a college prof).
 
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Then there is always what Polonius said to his son Laertes in Hamlet:

Yet here, Laertes! aboard, aboard, for shame!
The wind sits in the shoulder of your sail,
And you are stay’d for. There; my blessing with thee!
And these few precepts in thy memory
See thou character. Give thy thoughts no tongue,
Nor any unproportioned thought his act.
Be thou familiar, but by no means vulgar.
Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried,
Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel;
But do not dull thy palm with entertainment
Of each new-hatch’d, unfledged comrade. Beware
Of entrance to a quarrel, but being in,
Bear’t that the opposed may beware of thee.
Give every man thy ear, but few thy voice;
Take each man’s censure, but reserve thy judgment.
Costly thy habit as thy purse can buy,
But not express’d in fancy; rich, not gaudy;
For the apparel oft proclaims the man,
And they in France of the best rank and station
Are of a most select and generous chief in that.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell: my blessing season this in thee!
 
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My Dad had many pieces of advice. My favorite:

  1. When packing for a trip take half the clothes and twice the money.
  2. When you receive an expensive watch/necklace/ring from your wife or girlfriend... immediately go out and buy an exact duplicate and stash it for the day you lose it.
  3. There's no such thing as a stupid question... just stupid people that ask questions (he was a college prof).

4) Don't wreck that chick until she's 18 years old.
 
"When they were handing out brains, you thought they said trains and you didn't want to take ride." Frequently shortened to " brains and trains".

"You better make a lot of money if you want everyone else to do everything for you".

"If you want it done right, do it yourself".

Not that I agree with all of these, but that's what I remember.
 
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Readers Digest has people send in things their dad always said. Favorite was one about raising children; "Between the hell of their living and the fear of their dying, there's never a dull moment"

Figure you guys will have some great quotes.

Talking about a cold Pennsylvania winter day he'd say...."It's as cold as a witches tit, out".
 
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Well, no specific phrase comes to mind. But he very seldom missed any of my baseball or basketball games and ALWAYS told me I played well.....even on those numerous occasions when I play. ed poorly or was the reason we lost.

Actually the most repeated phrase from my Dad was "I love you" and for that I have been and always will be exceptionally blessed. When he died 19 months ago I wrote about him here.....I wish I could retrieve that and post that today. My brother and I were very very lucky to have had him in our lives as long as we did. Sorry guys, got carried away here.....
Nice.
 
Dad told me at age 10....Gambit. You are the best son a man could have. You are handsome,athletic,intelligent, and wise beyond your years. Someday you will need to
pick a college. Whatever the hell you do, don't go to Temple or Rutgers. They suck in football.:)
 
The best part of you dripped down your mama's leg... :-(
 
my old man would say (when reacting to a lousy situation)..."we'll hell's pecker" or "geez oh Pete"...i never heard those terms from anyone else
 
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Readers Digest has people send in things their dad always said. Favorite was one about raising children; "Between the hell of their living and the fear of their dying, there's never a dull moment"

Figure you guys will have some great quotes.


When upset he would say "Son of a pup" (didn't want to use the word bitch around youngsters)

"And how much is this going to cost me" - about anytime I was in need of money as a kid.
 
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If you burn your ass don't forget you're the one who has to sit on it. Referring to my early sex life.
 
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No matter how good you think you are, someone is better. Keep working hard at what you are doing.
No matter how bad you think you have it in life, someone's life is worse off than yours. Suck it up and keep working.
Work hard for every employer no matter what you think about him/her, they are still paying you your wages.

I'll see you 'round like a donut!
 
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Close the door, I'm not heating the outside!

Wipe that smile off your face and play ball.

Measure twice, cut once.

They weighed the fat on that steak too boy!
 
Me: "Dad, can we get a pool? I wish we had a pool!"

Dad: " son, shit in one hand and wish in the other... See what you get more of..."

Me: "Dad, it's hot... I'm hungry..."
 
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"Keep it in your pants."

Advice (actually a command) to my brothers and I when we became teenagers. He followed that with, "Oh, you'll think you can hold up the world at 'that moment,' ...but you can't."
 
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They all look the same from the waist down.

No matter how tough you think you are you won't have to look far to find someone tougher.
 
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"It's tough playing a team with absolutely no academic standards." Said about pretty much every team Penn State ever played.
"It looks like Penn State came out with a finger stuck up their ass." Said at the beginning of pretty much every Penn State game.

My dad really hates when he or his team loses at anything. We were at his high school alma mater for a football game two years ago. His team lost and as they were coming off the field some people were clapping and saying things like "it's ok boys." My dad was booing them. His wife said, "honey they are just kids." My dad's response was, "I don't care, I'm not cheering a bunch of losers. BOOOOO!!!!"
 
"It's tough playing a team with absolutely no academic standards." Said about pretty much every team Penn State ever played.
"It looks like Penn State came out with a finger stuck up their ass." Said at the beginning of pretty much every Penn State game.

My dad really hates when he or his team loses at anything. We were at his high school alma mater for a football game two years ago. His team lost and as they were coming off the field some people were clapping and saying things like "it's ok boys." My dad was booing them. His wife said, "honey they are just kids." My dad's response was, "I don't care, I'm not cheering a bunch of losers. BOOOOO!!!!"
As far as my dad was concerned, the Redskins never lost a game, it was always the refs' fault they didn't win.
 
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Pop always said, "There's a lid for every pot." This, in reference to all the couples out there.

Me? I'm still looking for my "lid". Guess I'll just have to wait till someone creates atheistmingle.com
 
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