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OT: This sign should be mandatory at every Little League field

Class of 67

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Jan 30, 2007
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Parents are the worst at youth games over any other level. As an official, there's really no sanction you can give to a parent at that level. In high school or collegiate competition, you have the game manager toss them. In youth at the Y or whatever, there's nothing like that. I had a guy attempt to physically assault me over not calling a youngster (3 & 4th grade league) who actually collected a rebound, hunched over the ball, and stepped on the end line (going the other direction) as the new defenders were running down the court to set up their defense. The boy who rebounded was on the spectrum, yet this clown was screaming that he was out of bounds. After the game he approached me, I thought he was coming over to apologize, he was actually coming over to tell me I was the worst referee ever and getting in my face. The other parents watched it happen and did nothing. Third and fourth grade rec ball. In State College. That was my last game there. I'll take varsity or even adult league rec over that nonsense.
 
I have a Mom on my daughters softball team(8-10 year olds) that needs to be educated this way. It's so bad that the parents all basically say...there she is and sigh when she attends the games. My daughter is the only new player on the team and it took one game for me to see why they reacted that way. She got up went on to the field and called he Assistant coach an idiot because he didn't argue with the teenage umpire on a league rule of one base to an overthrow. This was in front of that coaches daughter as well. She then went and tried to explain the strike zone to the 16 year old female umpire...it just made you sick to your stomach.
 
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I have coached a number of youth sports and I know how hard it can be, but sometimes coaches need to be called out. There are appropriate ways to do this. Email I think is one good way.

There was a situation when my daughter played lacrosse (11-12 years olds) and the coach would simply not play her. I know why, it was because she was the slowest girl on the team. However, this was a "B" team in the club and was supposed to be a developmental team, not the top competitive team. Practices were Friday evenings and my daughter went to every practice. I watched the practices and saw about half the team would not regularly attend practice. I wrote to the coach and did not demand that she play more, but just asked if this was the way it was going to be so we could stop wasting everybody's time. The coach wrote back with some BS and cc'd the club president. Five minutes later I receive another email from the coach saying that she will be playing in the rest of the games. I guess the club president agreed with me.

The next game she played the entire game and scored 3 goals, they won by 2. It was a sweet vindication.
 
Yikes! Thanks for the reminder. After a few seasons off, I'm (assistant) coaching my son's little league team...first game is Friday after having NO practices due to rain. Can't wait :confused: !!
 
When my son was involved in LL, there were these parents of a teammate of my sons who to say the least, were quite vocal. One game, there was a coach of another team in the league umpiring behind the plate. They started mouthing off from the first pitch and by the third inning, he called time, walked over to the parents, took off his mask and asked "Would you like to take over behind the plate?" Neither one of them said a word the rest of the game.
 
Sorry in advance for the length but this is my fav story from youth baseball.

A long time ago when fall baseball was just becoming an option, my youngest played. The coach of his team meant well but was way too intense for what is supposed to be more practice and skills development rather than competitive play. I did not get along with him in Township play and wanted nothing to do with assisting him. He was always looking for me to help since I had coached in the Township for some period of time.

There were no umps since it was fall and a parent would normally ump. He nabbed me the first "game" and I reluctantly agreed. Before his son came up during his first AB, the coach walked on out and asked me not to call any pitch to him a strike. I asked why and was told it made his son nervous. I told him to get another ump. He was always looking for me to ump and I made it a practice to sit in the car until the second inning to ensure they already had an ump, normally another kid's grandfather.

Now for the fun time.

One of the bad things about the fall was that they were not age specific. We had one game where our 8-10 year olds were playing a 12-14 year round travel team. It was a joke to even play. But the other coach made it memorable. He was screaming at his kids, particularly the pitchers. He was telling his kids that our kids had no chance of hitting (he was likely telling the truth) so just lob it in there and don't worry. He was laughing and humiliating our kids. When our kids would strike out, the coach would laugh and yell "See, they ain't hitting anything." Our parents started getting into it with him early and it was not going to end well. The coaches kid was their SS and best player. Now what I am about to write is 100% true.

First time up, kid hit a rope for probably a double or triple. The second time up with his dad coaching third, his dad yells in to tell his kid to point with the bat ( a la The Babe) where he is going to hit it. At this point I'm done. I walk behind the backstop and get the attention of the grandfatherly ump. I tell him that no matter where the pitch is thrown by our kid to call it a strike. Trust me our kids aren't going to find the plate much. First pitch is two feet off the plate and the ump bellows "Strike1". Coach (dad) at third base nearly blows a gasket. Second pitch is three feet high and the ump bellows "Strike 2". Coach (dad) comes running down the line and starts yelling in the umps face. For some reason the kid hitting must have been so thrown off that he lets the one pitch that the kid threw over the plate that day to pass him by for Strike 3. Dad's head is about to come off his neck. It's not pretty. I immediately called the league commish and asked him to come by as he was on a neighboring field. Game called and that team was banned from playing on our fields again if that person was coaching.

I look back 15 years later and I ain't proud of what I did to contribute to that day's fiasco. But i have never seen such a display.
 
We have such a sign in our town. BUT, there are still parents and coaches that are, well, a "little needy".
 
It does not end on the field. Have been to some neighborhood parties and barbecues where parents say the nastiest things about other kids. One particular father was going on about a kid, and did not know the child's uncle was at the get together. Needless to say, it got very heated, although no fisticuffs were thrown.
 
I have coached a number of youth sports and I know how hard it can be, but sometimes coaches need to be called out. There are appropriate ways to do this. Email I think is one good way.

There was a situation when my daughter played lacrosse (11-12 years olds) and the coach would simply not play her. I know why, it was because she was the slowest girl on the team. However, this was a "B" team in the club and was supposed to be a developmental team, not the top competitive team. Practices were Friday evenings and my daughter went to every practice. I watched the practices and saw about half the team would not regularly attend practice. I wrote to the coach and did not demand that she play more, but just asked if this was the way it was going to be so we could stop wasting everybody's time. The coach wrote back with some BS and cc'd the club president. Five minutes later I receive another email from the coach saying that she will be playing in the rest of the games. I guess the club president agreed with me.

The next game she played the entire game and scored 3 goals, they won by 2. It was a sweet vindication.
I can match that. My son sat the bench for three years in high school with some limited playing time. I could see he was easily one of the best players on the team, but I didn't want to be that dad. Finally in his senior year he started and played every game (at first base although he was a better catcher). He then went on to play catcher at the D-1 level. You're right, some coaches are morons.
 
Parents are the worst at youth games over any other level. As an official, there's really no sanction you can give to a parent at that level. In high school or collegiate competition, you have the game manager toss them. In youth at the Y or whatever, there's nothing like that. I had a guy attempt to physically assault me over not calling a youngster (3 & 4th grade league) who actually collected a rebound, hunched over the ball, and stepped on the end line (going the other direction) as the new defenders were running down the court to set up their defense. The boy who rebounded was on the spectrum, yet this clown was screaming that he was out of bounds. After the game he approached me, I thought he was coming over to apologize, he was actually coming over to tell me I was the worst referee ever and getting in my face. The other parents watched it happen and did nothing. Third and fourth grade rec ball. In State College. That was my last game there. I'll take varsity or even adult league rec over that nonsense.

Exactly. As a high school soccer official, I've had the same experiences. I choose school leagues and adult rec over the youth ridiculousness. In HS people recognize they are accountable, and at least in adults I can just yell back at them.
 
True story. One of my favorite tasks was meeting with the parents of a boy or girl who was cut after tryouts for a varsity squad. A father once admonished me that my baseball staff had committed a biblical error in cutting his son...."Now we'll never know, he could have been the next Babe Ruth."
 
I can match that. My son sat the bench for three years in high school with some limited playing time. I could see he was easily one of the best players on the team, but I didn't want to be that dad. Finally in his senior year he started and played every game (at first base although he was a better catcher). He then went on to play catcher at the D-1 level. You're right, some coaches are morons.

Yeah I hated to be that dad. I tried to do it right. I am glad it worked out for your son.
 
True story. One of my favorite tasks was meeting with the parents of a boy or girl who was cut after tryouts for a varsity squad. A father once admonished me that my baseball staff had committed a biblical error in cutting his son...."Now we'll never know, he could have been the next Babe Ruth."

Sounds terrible. How could that be one of your favorite tasks?
 
On the flip side... i coached my son's team 3 years ago and was a "helper" on his LL team the last 2 years. Could not possibly have had a better experience. When I was the head coach I had none of "those parents", and other than some typical 10 year old boy attention span issues, had great kids. We lost in the semifinals and shed some tears but it was awesome. Kids improved, learned soprtsmanship, had alot of fun. Similarly the last 2 years I was close to the team but not an official coach. Different kids and I only casually knew one of the coaches going in, but again it was an awesome time. It was "what little league baseball is supposed to be about". We had the best player in the league on our team (not my son) and that boy's father was the head coach, but neither acted privileged in any way. In fact at one point in a tied, extra inning playoff game the son pulled himself off the mound in favor of a 10 year old teammate (so the boy could save his pitch count to pitch the next day IF we won that day. if we lost, season over). It was cool to see and experience. Both boys and parents made good friends on the team... again we didn't win (won the game above but eventually lost in the semis, again) but I wouldn't trade it for anything. With the right leadership, youth sports can be fantastic...
 
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